Abby Bern

Seven years ago, I thought a dream within me has already died. As a young naive girl,

I went home from Sweden with great disappointment thinking that I failed to pursue my desire to study abroad.I always long for adventure. I find it exciting to live in a different environment, to meet new people and explore unfamiliar places. I knew in my
heart that I was made for more, destined to be somewhere else but my curcimstances were telling otherwise.

Years have passed, a lot of things have happened that I have forgotten the promise I made myself that day. I told myself that someday, I will return to Gothenburg, Sweden to study. I have moved on with my life thinking that wherever God leads me, I’ll follow but it wasn’t always easy. I’ve made so many sacrifices, faced so many struggles which tested my faith and made me understand the real meaning of Surrender.

Looking back to what has happened in my life for the past few years, I can testify that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

Detours

Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

At first, I couldn’t understand why God has closed the doors for me to stay in Malaysia few months back. I was in that place for more than a year (July 2015 -December2016) where God was the only one I could rely on. I was alone but God was my everything. My journey in that country has taught me so many things and have molded my character into who I am now.  It may be my job in an engineering company that brought me to that place, but I believe God intended for me to go there so that I can hear His words from the two awesome pastors of Hope City Kuala Lumpur. I will never forget the day I received a prophecy from God through Pastor Dave and Jenny Gilpin. It may have happened in two separate occassions, but their words both aligned as to what God has already planned for me. It was a confirmation as to what God has been calling me to do. Such words I have placed in my heart that helped me in running my race.

Promise Before the Pain

The Lord has spoken to me through Pastor Dave Gilpin one Sunday afternoon after leading the congregation in worhip. This happened before the engineering company told me that they won’t renew my working visa. I received a word while everything was going well. There was a promise before I was about to go through the pain. These were the exact words God gave me:

“Abby, you’re gonna go through something, but don’t you ever give up. Whatever’s been pushed at you, whatever’s been pushing against you, you’re gonna get through it. Not just as Abby we know but a Super Abby that God knows. And He’s gonna mold you from a good girl into a great girl. And there’s something in your heart where you said, “ Lord, Make me. Mold me. Use me.” So what’s happening in your life, the pressure you are feeling right now is not just the enemy, it’s not just hell breaking loose. This is the preparation time to bring you into greatness. And you have a great gift in your life. You’re an outstanding leader. And I say most churches are quite happy with the way you are now but we’re building a super church here. And super church is built on people who have touched the grace of God. You’re gonna experience touching heaven. God’s gonna give you what Psalm 23 says, ‘HE will prepare a banquet in the midst of your enemies’. You’ll get through this. You’re gonna come out of this as such a woman of God. Your future will be like, as one says “one puts a thousand to flight and meets somebody else and puts a thousand to flight and guess what happens, the two of them joins to put 10,000 flights.(Deuteronomy32:30) ” That’s the league that you’re in. You’re in a ten thousand league. Don’t ever accept a thousand league, a hundred league. You’re in the 10,000 league. “ – Dave Gilpin// April 24, 2016

The words such as 10,000 league make me tremble. How would a little girl from Manila will be able to take such leadership? Who am I that He will entrust me with such privilege? I embraced every single word that was spoken to me.

Promise During the Pain

It was July 2016, right after I came from Australia, where I attended the Hillsong Conference (which has always been my dream and God has finally fulfilled it.),  that I received a news from my company that they won’t be able to extend my visa which was about to expire October 2016. My world collapsed. My dream of being able to finish my studies in Hope City’s School of Leadership and my desire to volunteer in the church became all blurry. It was that moment where it felt like hell is on the loose.

But on August 2016, during the She is Conference as I was leading the women in worship, Pastor Jenny Gilpin gave me a word from God. Such assurance during my pain and uncertainties. This is what the Lord has spoken to me:

“Abby, This is what the Lord says, “I know what’s going on in your life. I can see. I’m looking backwards. I know the places that you will live. I know the places, says the Lord, that you’ll work. I know the places that you’ll be.” I can even see in my spirit today all the people that you will lead. And I’ve got this funny saying in my spirit. It’s ‘Mighty Midget’. A mighty little midget, Tiny, but God’s put some guts in you. God’s put a roaring within your spirit. And it’s a roar that’s not gonna remain silent. It’s a roar that’s gonna lead a generation of women. I can see you preaching the Word of God. And I can see you leading women, and women literally lining up cause they wanna hear from you. And don’t think in your heart it’s gonna be the Western Girls. It needs to be a rise amongst the women of Asia. The Women Preachers Rise. The women are gonna rise and will have a voice and a say in the platform. I prophesy that in your life today, in the name of Jesus!” – Jenny Gilpin// August 13, 2016

I did all I can do so that I can stay in Kuala Lumpur. I wanted to stay badly that I was missing out on what God really wants. I intended to stay there, gave up my job when they told me that they cannot renew my my working visa. I then decided to apply for a student visa so that I can help the church there. But to my surprise, things still got messy that I didn’t get to go back due to complications with my school application.   I was so devistated. I did all I could to be in that place to grow but it turned out that God wanted me to take on a new territory. He knows my intentions were good and for His kingdom but the cloud has already moved.

New Places

Manila, Philippines

I went home to Manila, January 2017 clueless to what’s happening in my life. I had all the reasons to give up and to feel defeated. But I know for sure that my journey isn’t over yet! I had the assurance that God is preparing me for greatness and will bring me places. When I thought that my world was falling apart, God knew all along how to put the pieces altogether.

On February 05, 2017, we started a young adult group in my home church which we called VOX (Voice Out & Exist). Everything I have learned from KL, I was able to share it in my church in the Philippines. As God has been molding my character while I was home for couple of months, my love for my church grew even more. The people around me started to embrace change and the training I was sharing to them. Relationship with each other were restored and everyone is excelling in their service to God! My heart was so glad to see how God allowed my detour and my life to be a blessing to my church. I decided to keep serving God wherever I am and be faithful to what He has given me.

I wanted to settle in the Philippines but I kept playing the words God said about Him knowing the places I’ll live and work at. I know I would need to go somewhere in order to grow and go back home one day to lead His people.

Gothenburg, Sweden

Last November 2016, I had a dream which I will never forget. I believe it was a vision from God as to the next location I am about to enter. I was taking a nap one Saturday afternoon then suddenly God showed me these blue and red houses  in Sweden. It was gloomy and snowing really hard. And then I heard the voice of the Lord saying “This is my vision for you. This is what I want.” Waking up from that dream made my heart cry, knowing where God wants me to go next.  I told my relatives about it and they mentioned about a church in Gothenburg who offers Music Academy and is also open to international students.

My heart was still undecided at that time if I should pursue it since I was still in Malaysia and I wanted to help out the church there. But since God did not allow for me to go back to KL, I prayed to God about the vision He gave me. I told Him that if He really wants me to be in Sweden, then He will give me a visa as soon as possible since there is a Music Academy Audition on May 8, 2017. I applied for my tourist visa dated February 21, 2017 and it came to my suprise that instead of receiving the results in 2weeks, I got it in just 2 days. Though there were challenges along the way, I’ve seen how God provided for everything and how HE used different people to bless me and bring me to where I am now.

As I am writing this story, I am in Gothenburg, Sweden and very much happy and alive.

This is a testimony that God does not forget your heart’s desires as long as you keep focusing on His calling. He will align everything and make things beautiful on its own time. He brought back the dream I had seven years ago. And now, I would like to share the news that I got ACCEPTED in the Music Academy for this coming school year after a nerve-racking audition! God is amazing!!!

In all these, I have seen God’s favor, guidance, love and promises fulfilled in my life. There is a GOD behind all these and I cannot deny the fact that He has always been in control. And all glory belongs to Jesus who gave up everything  so that we can gain all things in His Name!

He may allow you to go on a detour that seem to be different from what you expected your journey to be. It may be difficult and painful but do know that God knows where HE’s leading you. HE is after your character and not just your destination. HE wants to be visibile in your life that even the people around you will not be able to deny His goodness and existence. I can assure you that He is the God full of HOPE, LOVE, and PEACE. He is for you and not against you. The future He has instore is greater than you imagined.

Now I know why He allowed me to go through all those storms. He was preparing me for something greater than I imagined. Let my life alone be a testimony of God’s love. My story does not end here. It only has begun.

Sincerely,

Abby Bern