During my quest in understanding the thoughts behind every man’s eyes, I tried interviewing most of my guy friends to have a glimpse of their world. It’s quite interesting what they have to say in terms of admiration, relationships and commitment.
Ladies, it’s great to have guy friends. I’m not saying go ahead and flirt anyone. NO! Again, guy friends NOT boyfriends. It’s great to have them to remind you that your ideal guy is just the same as they are. Ordinary men who have flaws, who are crazy enough to tease and make you laugh, who are willing to protect you from anyone or anything that could harm you. So don’t be afraid to befriend them and be wise enough to know if they’re already taking advantage of you. 🙂
I was surprised to see how men can transform from being chucklesome to becoming serious and sincere about life.
I asked them about their Girl Standards and I realized that most of their standards change as to their level of maturity and personality.
Guy Friend #1:
This guy friend seems to be serious about life and now at his mid-20s. He gave me qualities that mostly focus on a girl’s personality.
“I like a girl who isn’t too loud and flirtatious.”
Reserved (Dalagang Pilipina)
“I like to be with someone where in there’ll be no dull moments when you’re with her.”
Spontaneous & Consistent
“I like a girl who’s easy to get along with and who isn’t too high-maintenance.”
Out-going (Hindi KJ / Walang Arte / Hindi Pabebe)
“I like a girl who knows how to face life with dignity and who doesn’t compromise her own principle just to please a guy.”
Strong-willed (May paninindigan / With principles)
“I like a girl who has dreams and plans in life. Someone who’s smart enough to deal with everyday challenges and aims to have a good career.”
Achiever (May plano at Madiskarte sa buhay)
“I like a girl who doesn’t OVERTHINK.”
Understanding (Madaling kausap at umintindi)
Most of the girls give meaning to every single thing a guy does and sometimes over exaggerate it. Guys would like girls who makes life easy by fully understanding what they do or have to say.
“I like someone who has a Sense of Humor”(Patawa at Hindi boring)
Who would want to be with someone who doesn’t even know how to laugh? Men like to be with girls who can give a joke about anything that life throws at ‘em.
“I like someone who is Pretty” (bonus na lang daw ang ganda)
I was quite surprised to hear this from him maybe because he’s grown to be who he is now. But I’m still quite surprised that there are men who focuses on personality first before the appearance. All this time I thought that appearance matters first for them. I have generalized them all. I was wrong. 🙂
Guy Friend #2:
This guy friend who loves to play sports has a different point of view and I promised to include all he told me in my blog (apologies for any unwholesome words).
Physically:
“I like someone who is Morena” (with tan skin tone),
“I like someone who is Pretty and with a Good Butt (I don’t care about her boobs)” hahah… again sorry for this.
Personality:
“I like someone who is Smart.”
“I like someone who doesn’t NAG.” (Is there even a girl who doesn’t nag? she may not be saying it out loud.. but believe me guys.. she might be saying it to her friends or just even telling it to herself… or worst through a blog or the social media! haha so men, be nice).
“I like someone who isn’t Naughty but Nice”
(not angelically nice but saktong nice lang daw—feeling Santa Claus lang sya),
“I like a girl who loves kids.”
Guy Friend #3:
Now this guy friend has plenty of girl-friends.. not friends with benefits but simply lady-friends. He’s not flirty or anything, he’s just used to being around girls. I was surprised to see this side of him:
“The first thing you’ll notice and will catch your attention is her Appearance since you don’t know the person yet. When you say appearance, it varies. The only time you can say you’re attracted to her or not is when the girl is right in front of you.”
“The moment you get to know the person, you examine how she approaches and mingles with the people around her. You can tell who she is and how she will be towards you by the way she treats her friends, family and even strangers.”
Personal Traits and Habits. “Even though she’s weird and has unusual habits, you can still tolerate it and you’ll find it cute.”
“Someone who is Patient and Understanding despite of the conflicts and struggles we’ll have to face.”
Guy Friend #4:
I can say that this guy friend is so inspired that he was able to give all these traits. See what he has to say about his Girl Standards.
“I want someone who loves God more than me so that she would understand my passion in serving God. A girl who is willing to have a Jesus-centered relationship.
I want someone that I could protect. I’m not looking for a weak, fragile lady but what I’m looking for is someone that will depend on me and who’s willing to submit to my leadership.
I want someone who would care for me. Well obviously I’m not looking for a maid or yaya, I’m looking for someone that would make me feel at home, cook for me, someone who would smile at me when I’m tired, help me up when I’m feeling down… someone who will love me unconditionally.
I want someone who is Beautiful (Hindi ito bonus lang kailangan kasama talaga!)
But don’t misinterpret me, It’s not just something that fades, beauty is forever. When God created that special lady for me, she was designed to remain forever beautiful in my eyes:
‘A Lady with Eyes that melts you when they look at you,
Smile that eases your pain,
Touch that tells you that everything is all right (kahit mahirap na yung nangyayari)
Smile that gives you strength even when you are weary’
Last but not the least.
She should be God’s will for me. Everything that I mentioned earlier is not even enough to describe God’s best for me.
You might say that this is impossible or this is like a fairy tale, but it’s for real. I’m now married to that one woman God created for me. You just have to believe in God. Love and seek Him first and all these things shall be added unto you. God is faithful and all things work together for good to those who love God and to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
Guy Friend #5:
This guy friend’s a front liner. Most of the people look up to him as a leader.
Let’s see what he has to say:
“Standards? It doesn’t matter. I only need God’s confirmation: “She’s the One”. Whatever default standards I have in mind, I’m willing to compromise all for “She’s the One” that God has for me. And it’s not easy as well on my end. No matter how she passed all the criteria in my eyes and in the eyes of men, she won’t make the cut if She’s not the one. Even if she’s a super star, if she’s not the one, she’s not the one.”
Gathering all these thoughts from my amazing friends made me understand that not all men are the same.
Don’t generalize them all. 🙂
So ladies, remember that you don’t have to try soooo hard just to be noticed by men. You can’t even alter their thoughts towards you for they have different standards and principles.
The best thing to do is to be yourself, and allow God to lead you where He wants you to be. It’s only a matter of God’s plan as to whom He has for you at the very end of the isle.
Once He placed Mr. Right Guy in front of you, all you can do is to accept him for who he is and love him the way Christ would love him–unconditionally.
Sincerely,
Abby Bern 
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